How does therapy help with Deconstruction?
What does “deconstruction” mean?
Deconstruction is the process of critically examining the beliefs, practices, and teachings you’ve been given—often those from a religious or spiritual tradition. Often this starts with an experience or realization that doesn’t fit within the framework you’ve always operated in. It might start as a gentle tug, but can quickly spiral into a feeling like your whole worldview might collapse. For many, it means reevaluating what still feels true, what no longer fits, and what kind of faith or worldview (if any) is authentic moving forward.
Is deconstructing my faith the same as losing my faith?
Not necessarily. Some people end up leaving their religion entirely, while others find a deeper or reimagined faith on the other side. Deconstruction is about asking questions and exploring your beliefs freely.
Why would someone want or need to deconstruct their beliefs?
People deconstruct for many reasons: harmful church experiences, theological doubts, shifts in personal values, or unresolved questions about justice, identity, or belonging. It often starts when the answers you’ve been given no longer match your lived experience. For many, the experience is painful and confusing, and is not something they “want” to do. Instead it’s following one train of thought to the next and choosing not to ignore the dissonance.
How can therapy support me while I’m deconstructing my faith?
Therapy provides a nonjudgmental space for you to process your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. As a therapist I can help you focus on the impact of your shifting landscape on your mental well being. We can work through past trauma and hurt, fear, grief, the loss of identity or community, while also imagining and creating a future that brings harmony to your truth and experiences.
Will a therapist try to steer me toward or away from religion?
No. Ethical therapists will never push a religious (or anti-religious) agenda. My goal is to support your journey—whatever that looks like. You are in control of your beliefs, questions, and path.
Do I need a therapist who understands my specific faith background?
While not always necessary, it can be helpful to work with someone familiar with your religious culture or language. I aim to understand your unique experience and create a space where you don’t have to over-explain or defend your story.
What if I’m not sure what I believe anymore—is that okay to explore in therapy?
Yes. Therapy is a great place to hold uncertainty. You don’t need to have the answers. It’s about being honest about your thoughts and questions, and staying open to where the journey leads you.
Can therapy help me process religious doubt, grief, or identity confusion?
Absolutely. Many people experience deep grief, confusion and isolation when their belief system shifts. Therapy can help you understand what you’re feeling and support you in rebuilding a sense of meaning and self.
How do I deal with the anxiety or depression that’s come up during this process?
It’s common to feel emotionally overwhelmed during deconstruction. Therapy can help you identify the roots of your distress, offer coping tools, and provide a grounding presence (some call it their “weekly exhale”) as you navigate uncertainty.
What if I feel like I’ve lost my sense of self or purpose?
That’s a common and valid experience. When a belief system has been a major part of your identity, letting go or reshaping it can be disorienting. Therapy can help you reconnect with your inner knowing, values, and purpose.
How do I navigate family or friends who don’t support my questioning?
This is often one of the most painful parts of deconstructing. The experience can become very isolating. Therapy can help you set boundaries, communicate your needs, and find support systems that affirm your journey
Is it okay to feel angry at religious leaders or institutions?
Yes. Anger is a natural response to betrayal, control, or harm. Therapy gives you permission to feel and express that anger in ways that lead to healing, not more shame.
What if I still want to believe in something, but not in the same way as before?
That’s a beautiful and valid place to be. Deconstruction doesn’t have to end in total rejection—it can also lead to reconstruction, where you find a faith that feels new, whole, and freeing.
Do I have to talk about everything at once?
Not at all. You get to set the pace. Therapy is a space where you can open up slowly and revisit things as you're ready. You’re in control of how much you share and when.
What if I have trauma related to religion—can that be part of this work too?
Yes. Many people need to talk about their religious trauma as part of deconstruction. Therapy can address spiritual abuse, fear-based teachings, identity suppression, and more as part of your healing process.
Can I still go to church or be spiritual during therapy?
Absolutely. Deconstruction doesn’t mean abandoning spirituality. Many people still attend religious spaces, explore faith practices, or create a new personal spirituality. Therapy supports what is authentic to you.
How do I get started with therapy for faith deconstruction?
You can start by sending an email or scheduling a free 30 minute consultation. Together we can talk about your experience and collaborate on a treatment plan that supports your spiritual and mental health journey. The first step is the hardest.